it's lovee;

.Thursday, February 28, 2008 ' 11:24 PM Y

不想懂得
歌手：张韶涵

当世界　不知不觉的变了
有时后　我怀念以前的我
作的梦虽然远远的
想像是一种快乐
拥有了　同时也失去什麼
而眷恋　原来会带来软弱
你让我在雾里成熟心开始曲折

我不想舍得　不想懂得是谁惹谁　
言不由衷说谎伤害　都是不安犯的错
怕抱不紧什麼
我不想舍得　不想懂得
谁说割爱　才更深刻
彼此依赖是爱不是负荷
互相照顾就是幸福的

我愿意一秒钟放弃全宇宙
挤在只有我们紧靠的小星球

A song by Angela Zhang, OST of romantic princess.

I really dun understand why you love to hide things from me..and why is it you can be so truthful to others, why is it you can share your thoughts to others...but not me... am i so worthless to you? I really dun understand.. very upset.. :(

loved

.Tuesday, February 26, 2008 ' 10:55 AM Y

Finally got to sleep early yesterday night, at least i slept before 12am. But the rain this morning made me so reluctant to get out of my bed. hehe.

Went to the NTU talk on sat with fangxian..saw lottas people! We only went for one talk..which is the business and accounting double degree one...very attracted to the course..but first and foremost, you must have the results.. lol.. demoralised. So i went to look into other courses, including engineering..hmm..actually their engineering courses are not as bad as i thought..hmm..so can consider as my choice too..coz im aware of my standard and how i will fair for my a level results...hehe..so cannot have such high hopes too. :)

After touring around the booths..we went shopping in suntec and marina square! But before we went, we had our haigen dazz (i think i spelt it wrongly) yum yum! Only bought a pouch for myself coz i din have much time to shop too...gonna rush down to tbsc in the afternoon.

Heartland on sunday was interesting..saw my primary school form teacher and vice principal but i dun think they recognise me..

Checked my mail this morning and im so glad to see that our lionfish jersy is ready for printing! yayyee, this means that i can get my shirt this sat during post chingay celebration! woohoo!! It cost $16, please remember to bring your money okayysss!!

And tada! This is the design of our shirt by ophelia! OMG, so cute right!!! Very amazed by ophelia's drawing, ur drawing is fantastic man! Unlike me, i can only draw stick-man..teeheehee.

I love my 18 sisters! wahaha... 15 members plus two trainers plus one cheorograher.. :) Very high recently..haven drank a single sip and make myself tipsy though.. i guess its the friends and colleagues around me that made me so high...You all ROCK!!.

I miss my nehnehkiaz!! Lets meet up real soon okayss!!.

I know its time to move on, or shld i say i have already been on this train of thoughts a few months ago... But somehow..im still kinda emotional about this, i know i will somehow never forget you...and im still quite stubborn abt that relationship..that relationship we forge...din come easy..but it disappeared somehow so easily... although i always tell myself never to look back and i have always been looking at the brighter side..but everything still come to a conclusion..i still miss you lottas....i very much wanted to go back to past...the way we talk to each other, the way we made fun of each other..the moments when we waited for each other..the moments when we promised we wun hide anything from each other and also the moments when we bickered at one another..but i know its impossible and yet im still dwelling on it.. .

When was the last time we sat down happily to have a cup of coffee? When was the last time we walk together on a quiet street.... When was the last time we sat down to have a heart to heart talk... im still waiting for the day to come...although i know i shld just give up...and i hope i wun regret...

I admit im stubborn...coz my heart just choose to beat on you tonight...or perhaps every single night... nothing seems to change me and my impression of you... im sorry..

loved

.Thursday, February 21, 2008 ' 4:17 PM Y

Just found some photos from cherie's friendster! Thanks a lot for uploading the photos girl!! By the way, these were photos taken on 16th Feb, in marina square and raffles link!

Cherie, WoanLing and Me!! WoanLing is so sexy here!!

I din know angela and cherie love me so much! Muacksss!!

My dearie WoanLing and myself!

Look at cutie cherie and my chubbie face! :)

This week is going to be a busy week for jieying. Met up with wenqing, chye guan and joel at raffles city for dinner on monday, and also to discuss the emcee script! Then on tuesday, i wrote and typed out the script for wednesday's rehearsal. Had piano lesson on tuesday night. Paid my exam fees...so it means that i gonna pia very hard for my piano exam which gonna be in july or august! Gambette!!!

Wednesday! Had our rehearsal at syc. It was great!!! Managed to go through our scripts with the items going on.. This sunday's meeting gonna be exciting man!!! Coz the programs planned are really exciting, not becoz im the emcee so im enthu for the meeting, but trust me, the programs are really much more interesting than our normal asd meeting. hehe. Finally bought my asd shirt after 4 months... and im part of the designing team for this shirt....wahahhaa...and i bought it sooooo damnn late!! But anyway, thanks to teck kiang for the shirt. Rehearsal ended at around 10 plus, went home with minkit and junhao...haha...junhao the beggar! He really looked like one when he acted it during the skit performance. Good job junhao!!

Finally can go home to have my dinner today...had been eating outside food since last friday. yayee!! Very shag today...dunno why...maybe its becoz i slept at 1 plus am for three consecutive days. hehehe. Must sleep early tonight!!

jieying is a happy happy girl! Happy texting ahem this few days wahahahahaha thanks for the fast fast replies ehhhh! jieying is so happy to have you to entertain her! So entertain her more and she will smile more okay!! This weekend gonna be hectic...Sat: NTU talk in the morning with fangxian, heartland performance in the late afternoon and night with my darling lionfishes! Sun: ASD meeting in the morning at SYC.. then heartland performance in the late afternoon and night at marsling to sembawang...very near my house YAY!!! Then next week gonna watch movie and shop shop!! wahahahaha!!

smile Smile SMILE!!! :)

loved

.Monday, February 18, 2008 ' 11:22 AM Y

Its been a busy yet meaningful weekend for me!! Last friday and saturday were the preview and actual for chingay respectively! One word about chingay....SHUANG!!! haha, thats what i told minxue after the end of the performance. Camwhored a lot with my lovely sisters these two days!! wahahhaa... I know minxue will collate all the photos and save them all into a cd for us on 1st of march....but being a little gan jiong, i went to minxue's blog to kop some photos..hehehe..whoops whoops!!! :)

So here are the photos of our pretty faces!!!!

My lovely sisters with our two pretty trainers!

cherie, joey, shanmei, ophelia, me and olivia

MAKANing dinner on 16th feb.

Our pretty fins.....Credits to our prop aunties uncles... you all are really ZAI!! :)

Lionfishes with jelly fishes

We are LIONfishes. not TIGERfishes...rawrrrrr!!

Float float!!! Wave wave smile smile!! Say HELLO to singapore and our tourists!!!

US after the entire parade....still so enthu to take photos....HEHE!!! :)

Thats all about the photos!!!! Really had a lot of fun in chingay!! And these practices really made me a stronger person..it gives me strength to continue to move on and live with whatever circumstances i gonna face now and in the future. A great THANKS to our two beloved trainers, peijun and minxue!!!! You two are really great partners and fantastic role models! I will definitely miss chingay 2008 and my LIONFISHES!!!

Spent my entire sunday watching romantic princess....its very very sweet and funny!! hehe....dunno why...somehow...i still like nan feng jin more than nan feng lin...nan feng lin is too playboy and talkative whereas nan feng jin is more mature and firm in his thinking...hehe....both are equally shuai though.. hehehe.

Thought this week will be less hectic for me....but i guess im wrong.. Today, gonna meet wenqing and another ymd for dinner and discussion about this sunday's asd meeting...oh anyway, kana the emcee role..hahha..so yea.. And i think im going for this sat and sun's heartlander performance..one is at bishan-tpy, and the other one is at marsling-sembawang (which is just at my block downstairs or somewhere super near my house!!, mummy said she gonna support me this sun..hehe...interesting!) NTU open house is also on this sat, at suntec city conventional hall...going to attend with fangxian as promised. hehe.

I really cannot stand flirts. Mass/cultural performance trainings is a platform for one to gain new experiences and make new friends..and not only making close friends with people of the opposite sex. It kinda spoil the meaningful purposes behind it. :(

loved

.Thursday, February 14, 2008 ' 2:58 PM Y

HAPPY VALENTINES TO EVERYONE!!!!!
Its a special day to spread your love to everyone around you and also to ur loved ones. hehehe.

As for me, sad to say, i got NO valentines date. hmm, and on the other hand, there is a chingay diamukukai tonight at tbsc, so ShuLi and Xuelian shall be my valentines tonight. wahahahaha. Im a poor little girl coz nobody wants me... sobsob! :(

Yesterday was our last chingay training in PA!! Gonna miss that place very much, coz i wun know when will be my next time stepping into the PA ground.. My lionfishes were playing the "ma tong" game, and this idea was by peijun. Laughed a lot last night......thanks to yahui. Seems like yesterday was the best training i ever had in these two months. Had a few dry runs and a few music runs for the cityhall and also the normal street parade. So as a result, i was on the whale float most of the time. It feels so shiok to dance in the whale foat WITHOUT the costumes, so much more spacious and comfortable. And also, the noisiest float participant wasnt here yesterday, but another noisy participant came on board, which then somehow brings life to the entire float. His words made the entire float participants laughed! hahaha.

Oh, and before i forget, let me mention something....our dearest wenqing will be here tonight with us for the diamukukai!!! yeepee!!!

I just simply hate to change decision again when i feel quite settled down and comfortable with my current situation. I hope this matter will be resolved asap. Feb is coming to an end soon, which means march will come in soon... I wonder what my final decision will be.... in a diliema, but the for the very least, im glad that for any decisions made, it wun affect me much and will in effect benefit me....there gonna be no harm for me and i wun be at loss. Seems like there are so many things to worry about.... my piano exam fees, my final decision i gonna make in two weeks time, and also most importantly..my a level results!! rawrrrr!!!! Sometimes i wish i can stay in the CNY holiday period as long as possible....then i dun need to think that much...

On the brighter side, tmr is the starting of the chingay showcase!! Tmr is the preview, and saturday is the actual! Must support chingay okay!!! No matter what means you all use....either supporting us on air, or coming down to the actual ground! Your supports are very important to every single participant in the chingay parade!!! And also good luck to all the chingay participants, not only the SSA members but everyone!!!! Especially to my dearest lionfishes!!! All of us gonna chio mi mi okay!!!

Alright, shall end my entry here!! Have a nice day dudes!! :)

loved

.Sunday, February 10, 2008 ' 12:18 AM Y

oo...its the 3rd day of new year. Yesterday was real boring...stayed at home the whole day to eat and sleep, just like a pig! eeeeeee!!!

Today is better!! Went out with peggy the whole day! Met at cwp first before going to marina square. The stoopid gv at marina square had some problems printing the movie ticket, so we ended up watching kungfu dunk at suntec. Walked around and had lunch before watching. "Kungfu dunk" is really so hilarious and nice okay!!! Especially the part when fang shi jie guan lan and ended up slamming onto the board. Went for shopping after that at far east...wanted to visit yiwen initially, but we reached far east too late...ard 8 plus..so din get to see her. Bought a pair of shoes and some inner wear stuffs before going home. Woah.....my leg is aching like mad now....after walking ard in town for the entire day. But today is really a great day! At least i got to watch my shuai ge's movie and come home with some stuffs after a day of shopping. hehe.

Saw Kang Yu with some of my pj friends today at raffles link.. so surpised to see them together! haha... JiaLe went "she is my geog trip mate!! I rmb!" when she saw me....hahhaa... and i went "chang chang de!!" when i saw kangyu. ehhheheee..... i call him this nickname ever since sec sch! So reminiscing!!!! :)

Watching cj7 with huat tmr...yay...he is treating me tmr!! hehehe! happy happy!!

Jieying is a greedy girl who wants a lot of money and a lot of treats. hehehe :)

loved

.Wednesday, February 06, 2008 ' 12:02 PM Y

Photos photos!!!!!! Look at the fun we had that night!! hehehehe.

tiff, me, mingxuan, nat, lynette, sandy and peiling

Look at my long silky hair!! hahaha

random shot! woohoo...i love my backview! hehe.

mingxuan, me and ben

mingxuan, sandy and me

so sexy! Gay party arise!!!!! :)

Me, Jackson and ben

woohoo...they love me so much! wahahaha

me and jackson.

me and myron.

random shot while sending ben home.

me and peiling.

another random shot. Is my shirt nice? wahahaha

wahhhh....my head is so biggggg!

another shot of jackson and me.

This is my stoopid dare. I din wanna **** the tree either. And why is sandy laughing so happily?? hahaha

Thats all for the photos!! Thanks to sandy for sending the photos to me!!! Happy chinese new year the everyone!!!! Have an enjoyable new year and must recieve a lot of hongbao-s okayyyy!!!! SMILES!!!!!! :)

loved

.Sunday, February 03, 2008 ' 1:31 PM Y

Afternoon! The weather is neither sunny nor windy..but it just makes me feel like sleeping! Irritating weather!

First and foremost, happy birthday to sandy and nat!!! Never really see nat much in the chalet though..haha..

Oh well, reached home at ard 11.30pm ytd. Went for sandy's bday chalet straight after work, met jackson at je before going for the chalet together. Supposed to settle sandy's bday card either on the train or at je, but we ended settling it at the foodcourt of downtown east, so as a result, we reached at ard 9pm hmm..we thought we were late, but there were actually people who are even later! LOL. *Phew!* Saw ben ben aka huai ren cooking the bbq food when i just reached there..haha..so as a result i could start eating even when i just reached. LOL.. thank you ben ben! hehehhee. Then at ard 11 plus, we were supposed to send jackson, myron (dunno if i spelt it correctly..pardon me for the mistake!) and ben back home. But when we reached the train station, we saw this signboard saying "train service ended" LOL.. So myron and jackson ended up staying, ben had to go home coz he has an econs exam the next day..so bobian, we hailed a taxi for him before walking back to the chalet. On the other hand, nat and his friends were already on the train although they left later than us!

So we walked back, cleared up the bbq stuffs and bathed. Had a great chat with mingxuan in the toliet while bathing. hehe... She is really a nice girl to talk to. hehehe....so lets meet up soon after you are back from china okay girl!! After bathing, we sat at the table outside and played some stoopid dare games before going to bed at ard 3 plus am. It wasnt a good sleep, coz i slept like as if im sleeping in a coffin, sleeping position as straight as a log, with my both hands crossed on my stomach! LOL.. so xin ku!

Woke up at ard 8 plus in the morning...talk cock for a while before leaving with peiling and jackson to have our big breakfast and chingay rehearsal. Hmm..was talking abt jc stuffs when we having breakfast in mac.. haha...i still miss jc days although sec sch days were even better. I agreed with what jackson had said yesterday.... Coz last time i used to dislike my jc days to the core.... i was praying so hard to get out of pjc as soon as possible.. But now im not schooling at the moment while waiting anxiously for my a level results... im temporary working...then i realised how precious my jc days are. haha..really...so at that time, jackson told me to wait till im no longer schooling then to see again whether does jc days really suck that much...haha...i guess its just the academy part that suck quite a bit, but other than that, its not really as bad as i used to think of. hehe.

The chingay rehearsal was awesome!! hmm...it was quite boring for the first part, especially the part when were in tbsc hall, after the long makeup session. Lionfish make-up is really WOAH!!! Dun really like the design of our make up...but we really looked very fierce and super lion! eee...so ugly. But after we wear our full dress costume, the make up actually blended well with the colour and the design of the costume...hmmm..so not that bad in that sense. Saw michelle chia and bryon wong (if im not wrong) during the rehearsal in PA. They were the emcees for the night...not sure if they are the emcees on the actually day itself. Heard the estacy cheer again after our first run through....then it reminds me of how me and li ling were laughing when WeiDe was introducing this cheer during last year's ASD connexion at sentosa. My lionfishes were so high at ard 8 plus pm!! We sang and sang like nobody's business, dance like some mad women on the streets, and cheer so loud that mingxue almost lost her pretty voice. So fun man! But anyway, that is the spirit that we, as a vibrant and active youth should have! Everything ended at ard 10 plus pm, not as late as i thought though.

Pretty float girls!! WanLing, ShanMei & ME!! :)

US after singing and cheering madly

Participants + trainers!!

Still feeling very shag now....not sure if im going to bugis for jay's event. He is coming at 5.45pm... I dun wanna stay at home today...feel like going out..but im feeling so tired now! Hate this type of feeling...and i dun stay at home on sundays. eeee

He is really nice to me now....but im just so disgusted by what he had done ytd..... The thoughts of it really broke my heart still... Why must he do that in front of me......or should i say...why am i so suay to see that scene!!!

loved